Married
by EmeraldScarlettIndigo
Summary: Set during the episode "Gay", shortly after Eddie and Patsy get married.


"It's alright, we're married!" Eddie yelled after the frankly overly nosy hotel maid as she located and removed a small object from the depth of Patsy's pants.  
"Cheers, Darling," Patsy sighed in relief taking the paperclip from Eddie's hands and chucking it.  
"Listen Eddie," Patsy began as she tried to pull the ring off her finger, "we are not married. It is not legal."  
"No. We are married," Eddie reached for her hand, "just keep it on till tomorrow, Darling."  
"Why"  
"Because then I'll be married to you longer than I've been married to anybody" Eddie admitted, "I've never even come back from my honeymoon and still been married!"  
Eddie sat on the bed staring at the scrap of paper with her sons address on it, dreamily wondering at how he would look now. Her son. All grow up. Meanwhile, Patsy felt a strange chill run down her spin and instinctively began to pour herself a drink. She downed it as she half-heartedly listened to Eddie's ramblings about Serge and her mind started to race. Her patience with Eddie wore thin and she eventually just snapped.  
"Oh, can we just stop talking about all this? I've had a hell of a day, I've got a lot of work to do and I'm very very tired" Patsy slumped down on the bed next to Eddie, raising the glass to her lips once more.  
"Good," Eddie stuttered, "'cause, frankly, I've got a headache..."

Eddie tossed and turned once more in the oversized hotel bed, but as much as she tried to ignore it, the dim light from the small desktop lamp and the soft glow of Patsy's cigarette distracted her completely. Eddie looked towards her friend who sat with her head resting in one hand as she poured over the seemingly endless pile of papers in front of her, and she began to feel guilty. This trip should have been about Patsy and her new job, but at some point Eddie had managed to, once again, make it all about her. And yet, once again, Patsy allowed her to completely take over- at her expense.  
Patsy's head began to droop slowly as she began to drift off. She suddenly started, sat up straight in her chair and crushed out her stub of a cigarette in the now full ashtray. She reached for the pack to start another.  
"Pats, darling. You should probably get some sleep" Eddie murmured softly.  
"I'm busy, Eddie" Patsy replied testily.  
Eddie knew better than to try to argue, so she sighed heavily, rolled over and began to fall asleep.  
She woke up again an hour later to find Patsy fast asleep at the desk, her head resting on top of the papers she had been so vigorously looking over, leaving a small puddle of drool over a sketch of a particularly gorgeous Valentino dress.  
Eddie pushed the covers off of her and stood up from the bed. She walked towards her friend and lovingly stroked her back. Patsy stirred.  
"Let's get you to bed, sweetie" Eddie cooed as she draped Patsy's arm around her shoulders, lifting her to her feet and moving her towards the bed as she had done many times before. Eddie pulled back the covers and lowered Patsy onto the bed and tucked her in. Eddie looked down at her as she snuggled deeper into the duvet and smiled sweetly before walking back around to her side of the bed and getting back in.  
"Night, Eddie" Patsy slurred sleepily.  
"Goodnight, Sweetie"  
They both settled. This was safe for them. All snug in bed. Together. The stale smell of tobacco, champagne and chanel number 5 lingering in the air. Patsy always considered this home in a way. It didn't matter where in the world they were, as long as she had Eddie, cigarettes and a bottle of Bolli she was home.  
Patsy rubbed her tired eyes and something cold on her finger made her jump- straight out of bed.  
"Jesus Christ!" Eddie started awake at the sudden movement. Patsy stood, shoulders hunched and face ghostly white, staring down at her.  
"Well what?" Eddie asked, "what's the matter with you?"  
Patsy shook herself out of her daze and moved back towards the desk.  
"Too much work to do Eddie."  
"Oh, for God's sake. Can't it wait till the morning?"  
"Not if you want to go looking for Serge"  
"Ah!" Eddie pointed an accusing finger, "so that's what this is about. You don't want to go looking for Serge."  
"No, Eddie."  
"It's alright, Darling" Eddie got out of bed once again, "this shouldn't be about me and Serge-"  
"Eddie..."  
"No, I've been thinking about it and-"  
"Eddie..."  
"This should have been about you and your new job and-"  
"ED!"  
Eddie stopped in her tracks and looked towards Patsy inquisitively.  
"I don't mind looking for Serge. I know how excited you are about seeing him again" Patsy stated matter-of-factly, before turning her attention back towards the papers on the desk, "besides, I didn't marry you for nothing."  
Realization suddenly hit Eddie. How could she have been so stupid? She'd always known that marriage was one of Patsy's biggest phobias- the thought of being trapped in a relationship for the rest of your life honestly made Patsy feel smothered and suffocated to the point where she would break out in hives. Patsy downright refused to attend either of her weddings. Eddie pulled up a chair besides Patsy who instinctively shifted away from her in her chair.  
"Sweetie," Eddie placed a hand on Patsy's shoulder, which was quickly shrugged off, "Darling, you know our little marriage isn't real, hm?"  
"Then why won't you let me take the ring off?" Patsy murmured uncomfortably.  
"Take it off if it's bothering you that much. Throw it out the window for all I care! I just thought it might be fun to be married for a while. That's all... a funny story to tell. Could you imagine Saffy's face?" Eddie chuckled.

Patsy conitued to stare down at the ring on her finger absent-mindedly.  
"Would it make you feel better if I slept on the sofa, Darling? Like some kind of dog? Hm?" Eddie asked as her impatience grew.  
"Fine," Eddie exclaimed standing to her feet, "take it off, don't take it off. Sleep, don't sleep. See if I care." She sulking slunk back into bed. Turning onto her side with her back towards Patsy.  
"Eddie?"  
She continued to sulk.  
"Eddie?"  
Still nothing and Patsy began to worry that she'd really offended her.  
She stood to her feet and slowly walked towards the bed. She lifted the covers and gingerly got in. She timidly placed a hand on Eddies shoulder. Still no reaction. So she burrowed her head into the crook of her arm and Eddie turned onto her back to allow Patsy to snuggle up to her, resting her head on Eddie's chest. The soft pounding of Eddie's heart beneath her ample bosom was always oddly comforting to Patsy and she began to feel safe again.  
"I'm sorry Eddie," Patsy whispered, "you know how crazy marriage makes me. Even if it's to you..."  
"But it's not a real marriage" Eddie cooed as she stroked Patsy's long blonde hair.  
"But we are married..."  
"Yes... I guess we are."  
The two women contemplated this silently as they both drifted into a deep sleep.

Patsy was the first to wake the next morning. She felt her head rise up and down in time with Eddie's breathing and found a sense of comfort in the fact that Eddie's arms were still wrapped tightly around her, pulling her close. She rose up slightly to look down at Eddie's face as she slept. Her long eyelashes were smudged with mascara that she'd obviously either forgotten or failed to remove and her brown hair was matted across her face. Patsy brushed it out of her face and Eddie's eyes fluttered open and she smiled. Without even thinking, Patsy swooped down and kissed her. She froze, lips still touching, as she realized what she had done. But before she could pull away, Eddie rolled her over onto her back and returned her kiss. Patsy's lips parted in surprise, Eddie took the opportunity to deepen the kiss and both moaned as their tongues met. When the need for air became too great, Eddie pulled away and began to trail hot wet kisses down Patsy's cheek and down her neck. Patsy freely ran her hand up the back of Eddie's thigh, raising the hem of her nightgown and began to stroke the soft white flesh of her ass. She could feel the heat rising from her core mere inches away from her hand, so she slowly and gently plunged two of her fingers in.  
"Oh, Pats," Eddie moaned into her neck.  
Patsy began to move her fingers inside Eddie in a slow and steady pace.  
"Faster" Eddie growled as she allowed her hand to slip into Patsy's shirt, softly caressing her breast and eliciting a shocked gasp from Patsy, who in turn complied with her request. Pretty soon she could feel Eddie's muscles tightening around her fingers and she knew that Eddie was close. Eddie was never one to be quiet in bed and her moans of pleasure only served to spur Patsy on. Eddie's hand reached out and grabbed the duvet, balling up into a fist as she groaned into Patsy's neck. Patsy could feel the muscles spasm around her fingers and a satisfactory smile graced her face as she held Eddie closer to her. She gave Eddie a few seconds to recover before slipping her soaking wet fingers out of her. Eddie raised her head to look down at Patsy, just in time to watch as Patsy sucked her fingers clean, maintaining eye contact with her and thoroughly enjoying the effect it obviously had on her friend.  
Eddie hungrily kissed Patsy once more before softly whispering in her ear- "your turn".  
"Eddie," Patsy stopped her, looking up at her friend lovingly, "you don't have to, Eds".  
"No," Eddie kissed her once more, "But I want to, Darling."  
Eddie reached behind her and pulled the duvet over her head as she shimmied down Patsy's body. Before she could protest again, she felt Eddie's hot tongue at her entrance. She marvelled at the way Eddie skillfully used her tongue in all the right places, starting slowly and gently at first and steadily building a rythm until Patsy felt the need to reach back and cling to the headboard, leaving scratch marks in the wood from her long fingernails. She could feel the tension building in the pit of her stomach and finally came with a loud - "EDDIE!".

Eddie and Patsy lay in bed in each others arms, passing a cigarette back and forth between them.  
"Eddie?"  
"Yes, Daring?"  
"Did we just consumate our marriage?"  
"Yes, sweetie," Eddie chuckled, "I think we did".


End file.
